I DREAM OF HAGGIS

i have to come clean: i'm not much of a baby person. My insides don't liquefy in the presence of a poop factory (a.k.a. babies) nor do i long to be surrounded by babies. In fact, when i go to a dinner party or some social event at a friend's house, i get irritated when strangers bring their babies. Why? Because people suddenly go from talking about interesting adult subjects - like booze, drugs, music, and sex - to babies, nappies, and teething.

Everyone is suddenly enslaved by the baby at hand.

That being said, however, i find that Europeans are more "rugged", so to speak, with babies and i find that refreshing. For example, parents in North America seem to run on their babies schedule (i.e. nap time and feedings) whereas i find parents here will bring along their babies for adult things like coffee, lunch, and dinner parties and their babies just have to adapt.

So, it's both refreshing and annoying because it seems i am constantly engulfed by screaming mini-humans.

However - and this is a huge HOWEVER - i am in love. i mean, i am butterflies-in-the-stomach, longing-for, head-over-heels in love. My insides melt and i am awash with warm feelings and as if i am drowning in liquid hot butter. Yes, i am in love with that baby pictured.

Everything i ever thought about babies DOES NOT apply to my friends' babies. i'm a hypocrite, i know. But then again, you have probably never met this baby! This baby has a beautiful name - Bronwen - and is the creation of my good friends, Kate and Jason. Bronwen is one of the most beautiful creatures; yes, she is stunningly cute but she is also shy, delicate, and, of course, will one day be a brilliant and kind woman because she's the daughter of two great people.

Nevertheless, my whole point is that i've become a cliche and someone i never thought i would be: see, i've taken to printing off pictures of Bronwen and putting them up at work AND home. i've taken to talking about Bronwen to complete strangers who couldn't give a shit. But really, they have just never met this kid! i long to see Bronwen grow up and i was honestly devastated that i missed her 1st birthday. i have even taken to putting her picture on my computer desktop at work.

My Toronto single friends would be mortified.