I DREAM OF HAGGIS

i am currently feeling a little bit under the weather. Nevertheless, i am totally excited that in about 24 hours i will be landing in Toronto, and rushing into the sculpted arms of my bitter queen!

Last night was pretty crazy - but in a good way, i think. i met up with my friend, Anna, for a drink (JUST ONE, MOM. Geez) and said our goodbye's until we see each other in the new year. Afterward i met up with The Ex-Rugby Player for some unbelievably yummy French baked cheese and wine at The Cheese Bar. There were so many delicious things to choose from; i wanted to eat my way down the menu. Sometimes i am utterly impressed by the places in Glasgow, and last night was an exercise in me eating my own words about how Toronto has much better restaurants. i think i still maintain that Toronto does have some better places to eat but really, that's just by default since Toronto is about four times the size of Glasgow.

After dinner we headed back to the infamous establishment where i cracked my head on the concrete floor (the wound is healing well, by the way), for a drink. i guess Monday evenings at this particular pub is Old Dudes' Night and Loud English Men Night Out because that is exactly what it felt like. However, there was a group of four people sitting behind us (3 women and 1 man) who - as the evening progressed - just got weirder and weirder. In fact, at one point, when the sole male left the table, two of the girls started kissing and snuggling each other and it might not have been so bad if they weren't so heinous-looking.

It was kind of tragic.

At this point, Ex-Rugby Player made a face that encapsulated the entire essence of the bizarre event and it was so fucking funny that i literally spat out my red wine all over the table and on his shirt. i am all class. i felt really bad but honestly, it was so funny that there was no other option - perhaps maybe death from choking on my wine and own tongue. i apologised profusely and as i cleaned up the wee mess i thought, "how is it that i'm single again?"

i guess Ex-Rugby Player read my expression because he then stated the obvious, "you are a nightmare". He was half-joking. i think.