I DREAM OF HAGGIS

You Can't Go Home Again

i am back in Glasgow, returning to a dark, wet, and windy city. My flat was cold - as usual - and immediately i missed staying with my best friend at his brand new loft in downtown Toronto. i forgot what it's like to stay in a properly heated apartment with strong water pressure. The weather in Glasgow yesterday and today, however, was gorgeous; how did i take full advantage of the sun and warm climate? i slept until 1pm! i blame the jet lag.

Here's the thing about going home: expectations and stress levels are high. i always found it slightly odd, going home to visit family that you really only see a few times a year. As such, some family members can assign you to the familial role that used to play - growing up - but are no longer. And sometimes it's easier to oblige them and go along with it then it is to change ways.

Despite the fights (with my step-father, step-sister, and brother, respectively), drama, annoyance and freezing cold weather but UTTER LACK of snow, it was well worth the $1300 to return to my homeland and see all the people and things that i have missed in the past 9 months. Here are just a few:
My best friend since the Bronze Age, Bob (Bitter Queen).My old haunt, Mitzi's Sister, located in the heart of Parkdale (Toronto). i have been dreaming about their black bean burrito and sweet potato fries for months. Also, they have McAuslan Apricot Wheat beer. On tap. It totally made it worth living in Crackdale!
The food, ohmigawd, the food. Witness: Mitzi's Sisters' Black bean burrito with HOMEMADE nacho chips, guacamole and salsa.Tim Hortons - every Canadian knows exactly what i'm talking about.
Big fat black squirrels: do they only exist in Canada 'cause almost every non-Canadian who sees one freaks out all, "those squirrels are black?! What the fuck, Canada?!"

Sneaky Dee's - otherwise known as Sneaky Disease. Awesome place for nachos, cheap beer, sticky floors, hipsters, and spending New Year's.








Milk that comes in bags. Again, is this a Canadian phenomenon? i've only witnessed bags of milk in Canada. My brother used to go through these 4 litre bitches like they were going out of fashion when we were kids. i think he is lactose intolerant these days...i miss you already, Tdot.