I DREAM OF HAGGIS

Last night my honourary Canadian friend, Anna, and i went to the Glasgow Film Festival to see a rare Canadian double bill: The Journals of Knud Rasmussen and Sarah Polley's feature-length directorial debut, Away From Her. Fifteen minutes into the first film, Anna leaned over and asked if i wanted to get some dinner instead.

i wasn't sure how long we could watch a plot less Inuit Canadian film for but it turns out the answer is fifteen minutes.

We were craving nachos and since we were in the City Centre, we decided that TGI Friday's would be our best option. Now perhaps i should preface this by stating the obvious: neither one of us had ever eaten at the chain but i've nevertheless been traumatised by its parody in Office Space.

Conclusion: Unless you like ABHORRENT service, unbelievably shitty food, and offensive decorations, DO NOT EAT AT TGI FRIDAY'S! EVER. NOT EVEN IF YOU WERE STARVING AND THEY WERE GIVING AWAY FREE FOOD.

Anna and i ordered "nachos" that - FYI TGI Friday's - were NOT nachos and subsequently sent them back. We refused to pay. The Manager was sent over and once we explained our stance, she grabbed the plate of "nachos" and wobbled away with an air of attitude. i've never caused a "scene" before but then again, i've never been served a plate of utter shit for £7.95 and given attitude by unapologetic waiters before. To be fair, it kinda made my night.

After going to another restaurant and eating somewhat proper Tex Mex food, we headed back to the GFT for Sarah Polley's film. And what an experience. The film is tender, emotional, and beautiful. The long snowy shots of eastern Ontario with a soundtrack provided by K.D. Lang and Neil Young, actually made me homesick. Add that element to the fact that the film is about Alzheimer's (something that my Welsh Nanny is afflicted with) and only four hours of sleep the previous night, and you have a recipe for sobbing. Poor Anna had to hide my tears from the rest of the stiff upper lip Brits as the lights came up...