Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Dear People On The Internet Who Google, "date Scottish men"; "what's it like to date Scottish men":

Just stop.

Or, at the very least, stop clicking on my blog.

I offer no insights on how to meet Scottish men - especially in America (where large numbers of people - women? - seem desperate to find Scottish dudes to date).

Dating Scottish men is a lot like dating ANY other kind of nationality of men: a lot of headache and heartache! If you're from North America, you'll probably think they drink a lot too. And speak funny.

Please be advised that the majority of Scottish men do not look like Gerard Butler or John Barrowman nor are they strutting about in kilts, reciting Robert Burns poetry, while inviting everyone to their highland cottages.

Instead, rent the film Trainspotting but instead of heroin, replace it with alcohol, football (soccer) and hanging out with their "mates" until they are so drunk, they can no longer speak or feed themselves the late-night "kebab" they bought and then, and only then, you may know what it's like to date a real Scottish man.

For more of my experiences as a Canadian woman dating Scottish dudes, click here, here, here and here


Loth said...

Kebabs are not for eating! They are for falling asleep in. Didn't you know that?

David T. Macknet said...

I know a guy who's always getting search traffic because of his talking about Irish Stew. Yep - a guy with a blog, who happened to make stew once, and who lives in Derry, so ... he gets the Irish Stew queries.

Jennifer said...

Kebabs are probably better slept in than consumed.

DaviMack - evidently there are millions of people out there looking to date Scottish men and make Irish stew and somehow end up contacting us about such matters.

David T. Macknet said...

You're an expert, of course.

This means that you, alone, may end up stemming the tide of wannabe Scotsman-daters.