because my heart is just a muscle
and simply put, it's sore
I really need to stop with these monthly updates and get back into regularly posting.
Ever since breaking up with my ex, I feel I've been negotiating with chaos; a fruitless attempt to give my life order once again. Just when I think I've managed to give my life consistency, I'm thrown yet again into a chaotic spin. You see, I have to move - again! However, it's cool because after a few years away, I am finally moving back to the WEST END. Also, I can't have stability in my life - that would just be foolish, right? And as much as Govan has grown on me (and in all honesty, it has. really), unfortunately my cute little flat in Govan has sold so once again, I'm the Littlest Hobo - maybe tomorrow, I'll wanna settle down.
Another reason for the lack of updates is due to the simple fact that I no longer have the Internet at home. Initially it started off innocently enough: I was on a month-to-month contract and it was unreliable. So, I cancelled it. Not out of principle but just because it simply sucked. And wow - what a difference. I can't believe the amount I have managed to get done without distraction: running, reading, and just being awesome. Seriously - I cannot remember the last time I have lived without the Internet. Maybe 1992? That said, I plan on getting fibre optic cable at my new flat. What can I say? It was available and I need to stream hours of YouTube.
Also, I've been dating. That's always a good distraction as well. Initially I tried out Internet dating but to be honest, it was a bit horrific; it just seemed to magnify my inability to "click" with dudes. So, after about a month of online dating, I cancelled my account. That said, I have continued dating. I suppose I've been "seeing" someone although it's in that strange/awkward/ early stage where you're not really sure what you are and where it's going, you know? And besides, why ruin things with labels? I suppose more than anything now, I've grown to appreciate the here and now. Afterall, it's not the destination but the journey, right?